Welcome to Weekend Writing Warrior and 8 Sentence Sunday, the weekly hops for everyone who loves to read and write! Writers share an 8 to10 sentence snippet. Be sure to visit the other writers. You can find them here.
Is it the weekend already? Hubs and I returned home from visiting our son & his family in Arizona. Michigan welcomed us with snow and bone-chilling cold.
My snippet is from my upcoming release, THE CASE OF THE MEDDLING MAMA, an Alex O'Hara Novel, third in my cozy mystery series. Along with some creative punctuation, It hasn't been edited yet, so suggestions are welcome.
This snippet is from the first chapter and continues where last week's snippet left off. While Alex tries on a bridesmaid dress for her friend's (the store owner) wedding, she's introduced to a potential client.
Poor Ginnie—a deer captured in the
headlights had nothing on her—with her blond hair and fair complexion, her
embarrassment was even more apparent, so I figured I’d better do something to
break the awkwardness. With a smile, I leaned over, held out my hand, and said,
“Hi, I’m Alex O’Hara, reluctant dress shopper.”
“Ginnie Bakker, also a reluctant
shopper,” she said as she shook my hand and returned my smile. “I like your
dress.”
I preened—didn’t get a chance to do
that very often since elegant clothes were not my normal attire. In fact, I
felt more comfortable in the jeans and T-shirt hanging on hooks in the dressing
room. Give me a good pair of running shoes, and I’m happy.
“The gown is for Ellie’s wedding
next month,” I said as I twirled around and nearly ended up on my face, pins
scratched my ankles through my socks, and I almost wrenched my ankle—high heels
and I never got along.
“Whoa, are you all right?” Ginnie
said, putting out a hand to steady me.
While I laughed, Ellie rushed up to
us saying, “Is Klutzy Alex at it again?”
Rough blurb:
PI Alex O'Hara, just rescued from another kidnapping attack, needs a break to enjoy Nick's attention when his mother shows up, claiming she's left his father, and is moving in with Alex. No way is she sleeping with Nick with his mother down the hall. Her new case, a background check on a potential suitor, is exactly the direction she wants to take the agency. The teen boy they rescued from an abusive stepfather is sure his buddy is doing drugs. And Nick's job takes him away. Again. At least the background check should be a piece of cake.
Love the part about the pins catching her ankles. That's so realistic. Good scene overall.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Cara.
DeleteWow, Alex sounds like me. I'm all for jeans and running shoes. With a t-shirt or sweatshirt, depending on the weather. It's too bad that you came back to such cold weather, but spring is just around the corner. Hope you enjoyed your time away! :)
ReplyDeleteI understand they had warm (yes, warm) weather here while we were gone. Loved the time with Toddler Girl. She's talking so much!
DeleteA cozy mystery, eh? My wife devours them faster than most authors can write them, so I'll show her the snippets. In a week and a half, we're doing the opposite of you: leaving Arizona to visit a son in the cold north (Toronto).
ReplyDeleteI hope your wife likes the snippets. Hopefully the weather in Toronto won't be too cold for you.
DeletePractically passing in the sky . . . I'm leaving MI to head to AZ in a few days. Sunshine and hot tub, here I come! Nice snippet, recalling me to bridesmaid days of old.
DeleteSafe travels, Nancy. Remember those awful bridesmaid dresses? I tried to think of something Alex would love.
DeleteDelightful snippet. You tell a good story.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Charmaine.
DeleteEnjoyed the scene and could really visualize it from your description. I like the way this story is flowing - terrific excerpt.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Veronica. I've reworked the beginning too many times to count. LOL
DeleteGreat scene, and I loved the klutzy part at the end. ;)
ReplyDeleteKlutz is Alex's middle name.
DeleteI gave up on high heels years ago!
ReplyDeleteMe, too.
DeleteI enjoyed the snippet - a woman, like me, who prefers jeans to a dress, and can't walk in heels! Glad you returned home safely.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Rachel.
DeleteCould have been me back in the day! I enjoyed the snippet, Diane. Also love the idea of #WeWriWa (spotted your post in my mystery paper.li today) and plan to join in the fun beginning in April!
ReplyDeleteThis is a lot of fun, Gail. You will enjoy meeting the supportive authors and reading their snippets.
DeleteShe sounds like quite a character. High heels should go the way of saddles - worn by a few, rarely and when it makes sense (like keeping your feet in the stirrups - for which they were invented)
ReplyDeleteReally? I had no idea. Cowboy boots are better. :)
DeleteI can sure relate to her balance issue. Loved the excerpt
ReplyDeleteThanks, Elaine.
DeleteHow embarrassing. I love pretty dresses, although I rarely wear them.
ReplyDeleteMe, either, Kimberly. No reason to.
DeleteHaha. Pretty dresses are fun, until they're not. Sounds like she might have made a new friend!
ReplyDeleteThat or a new client???
Delete