#30 Days of Gratitude - Day 30: Traditions

Two days ago I talked about the wedding tradition in my family. While that only happened every 20-30 years, gathering together to celebrate Thanksgiving happens annually. Well, at least it did until this year.

Covid.

Unfortunately, covid cases have risen dramatically in west Michigan. To stay safe, Hubs and I will celebrate by ourselves, while our children will celebrate with their families. It will be different. We'll still watch the parades, esp. the one in Detroit since that's where we both grew up. Maybe we'll watch the Lions game, if there is one. We'll FaceTime with each family and think about how we'll get together for Thanksgiving next year.

I want to thank Tara Tyler for starting this 30 Days of Gratitude. Since March, I've felt overwhelmed, upset, and down. I'd forgotten I have so much to be thankful for. Blogging for the past 30 days reinforced that even in bad times, I need to remember our blessings.

 

Christmas Traditions, Part Two

The tree is another tradition in our household. So are pictures—stills and movies. One year, I made a movie using stop action (along with Hubs’ patience) where the artificial tree assembled itself and added its own lights and ornaments. Another year, we put our two-week-old daughter under the tree, the moment preserved in a photo. Then there was the morning captured on film when our nearly one-year-old son toddled around the corner and saw the tree all lit and decorated. (One of these days, I’ll transfer those Super 8 films onto DVDs.)

While many people enjoy spectacular “themed” trees or are so talented that their trees look as professionally decorated as ones in stores, ours is filled with a mishmash of ornaments. As I put ornaments on our tree this year, Hubs made an observation. Now we’ve been married forty-one years and this is the first time he noticed how much enjoyment I get recalling the memories attached to ornaments—who gave it to us, when and/or where we bought it, who made it. Ornaments from our childhood. The gold mesh ball with potpourri made from our daughter’s wedding bouquet. Ones given to our son when he was little.

Lest you think I have a terrific memory, I’ve written on most of the ornament boxes the giver’s name and year received. (Is that cheating?) I do the same with my nutcracker collection. I wished I’d written the year on the first nutcracker my in-laws gave me. My mother-in-law didn’t know what she started as that one nutcracker from the mid-80s has mushroomed into close to a hundred. LOL At least I now have a home where I can display most of them. As I sit here writing this post, I look at the tree and the decorations and the memories keep interrupting.

Last, but definitely not least, is the nativity set. My first one when I was single had a few plastic pieces. With small children, I made sure the next set was unbreakable resin. Hubs even made a “stable” where the kids could rearrange the cows, sheep, shepherds, camels and kings. But Mary, Joseph, and the Baby Jesus always stayed inside the stable. My favorite nativity set is the one my mother made in ceramics class. Along with reminding me of the real meaning of Christmas, it’s like Mom is sharing Christmas with us.

No matter how you celebrate this season, my wish for you, my readers, is peace for you, your family.

Christmas Traditions

Like many of my Christmas traditions that are almost always late, so is this blog post. Not only did I have a hard time trying to come up with a post, my critique partner and I decided not to brave the weather and/or road conditions to meet in person. Instead we "met" on the phone. Since neither of us are short-winded (LOL) the phone call went on quite long.

Back to traditions. Despite all the chaos and hectic activities surrounding holidays--especially, Christmas--one of the things I love are the traditions. The things we "always" do over the holidays are a source of comfort. I know what to do. I don't have to flounder around trying to figure out what to do next. My problem is procrastination. Rather the sense that I have lots of time to get things done. Things like decorating the tree and the house, writing our Christmas letter and sending out cards, buying and wrapping gifts, baking cookies. Suddenly I realize time is running short and I'm frantic.

When I was younger, I worked myself into a frenzy to get "everything" done. I made my family, and myself, miserable. While Hubs wrapped the kids' gifts, there were some Christmas Eves I was baking cookies because we HAD to have cookies. Eventually, that was one of the traditions I let go to save myself some stress. The years we visited our daughter & her family when they lived in Indianapolis, I barely decorated, letting go more stress. Even though it took time and expense, we always got out Christmas cards. Some years, people received them after Christmas. Oh well, I rationalized, our family & friends were more relaxed then and could enjoy our messages.

In my stress and frenzy, I often forgot why I was doing all the things that I did. We went to church, but that was just one more thing to check off the list. I know better. Instead of celebrating what Christmas is all about, I let myself get trapped by "traditions" that had nothing to do with the true meaning. Maybe as we get older, we sort out our priorities. We realize what's important and take time to enjoy the process instead of practically killing ourselves to achieve the results.

This year, I baked cookies with my grandchildren. We did it to have fun. They didn't care that I hadn't made the dough by hand and bought the refrigerated kind that you pull apart. They had fun and so did I. Yesterday, they came over to celebrate daughter's birthday. Some decorations were up, most not, and it didn't bother me. I loved watching the six-year-old taking apart the nesting dolls and spreading them out and the almost-four-year-old captivation by a toy train that played music. The kids didn't care that the tree only had lights and neither did their parents. My daughter learned a lot sooner than I did to not stress over what wasn't done.

So the tree will acquire ornaments, the cards will go out, and the rest of the decorations will be hung--eventually. We'll go to church with our family on Christmas Eve and remember whose birthday we're celebrating.

As for cookies, I think I'll save baking more until the grandkids are out school after Christmas. And we'll have fun together again.

How do you handle the stress of the holidays?

Fall Traditions

Fall is a great time of year here in the Upper Midwest. Cool nights, crisp days, brilliant colors on the trees. Apples, cider and donuts. We prepare our gardens for winter, pulling up annuals, cutting back perennials, digging out pesky weeds, and planting tulips, daffodils, and other harbingers of spring.

One tradition that causes friction in some homes is turning on the furnace for the first time. My parents lived through the Depression. “Waste not, want not” was a frequent refrain. Don’t waste, save money is so deeply ingrained that I feel guilty when paying full price for anything. So when crisp days turn into dreary, rainy ones, I put on a sweatshirt and wear wool socks around the house (instead of my usual bare feet). The way I figure it is the longer we hold off turning on the furnace the lower the gas bill.

Another school of thought, to which Hubs subscribes, is why be uncomfortable. Although cold bothers him more than me, he, too, had parents who grew up in the Depression. For the most part, we agree on money issues. So, it was a surprise one day last week to return home and realize he'd turned on the furnace. According to Hubs, the inside temp had gotten down to 58. Okay, that is a little nippy. Well, at least we know our furnace works. After our new house was built but before we moved in they performed an energy diagnostic where they pressurized the house to see how much air escapes, testing for leaks, etc. Not only did our house pass with flying colors, it is so tight that there’s a pipe to bring outside air in for the furnace. Good to know. That’s supposed to mean that it will takes less energy to heat the house and keep it warm. We’ll have to see when we get our first bill.

For all my penny-pinching ways, I have to admit on rainy days like today it is nice to be comfortable.

When do you turn on the furnace? The first time the temperature drops or do you hold off?

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