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Saturday, June 3, 2017

#WeWriWa - The Protector: Why Does Rissa Help? #sfr

Welcome to Weekend Writing Warriors, the weekly hop for everyone who loves to read and write! Writers share an 8 to10 sentence snippet. Be sure to visit the other writers. You can find them here.


This week's snippet is from my sci-fi romance, The Protector (An Outer Rim Novel). Rissa rescued two young teen girls from traffickers and taken them to her quarters above her tavern. She just returned from getting clothes for them while they bathed. Pela is the older, more defiant one; Anaris, the more frightened.

Pela broke the silence, saying, “What are you going to do with us?”
Rissa sat on the end of her bed across from them and said, “I can find transport so you can return home.”
“No,” Pela said sharply, “I won’t go back.”
Anaris looked even more frightened and whimpered, “Please don’t.”
With delicate probing, Rissa got their stories—both girls had been sold by their fathers to the traffickers—and her heart twisted for them. How could a parent not appreciate the gift of life given to them?
After Rissa reined in her anger, she said, “You have a choice where to go, what to do--nobody will force you.”
Pela stood in front of Rissa and said, “Why are you helping us—what’s in it for you?”
“Repentance.”


As always, apologies for the creative punctuation, which was done to keep within the sentence limit.

Who knew rescuing two girls from traffickers would bring down a world of hurt?

After tavern owner Rissa Dix rescues two girls from a slave ship, she must rally the townsfolk to prevent traffickers from returning. Mining heir Dillan Rusteran has loved her for years. Little do they know that by rescuing more children they're tangling with a galactic trafficking ring.

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Thanks to everyone who stopped by last week, even though I'd forgotten to sign up. 



31 comments:

  1. I understand why they don't want to return anywhere. And that last line is definitely intriguing. :)

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  2. From rescuer to mom -- Rissa's burden just got heavier.

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  3. Repentance.

    Such a huge word, Diane. And very intriguing.

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    1. You cannot imagine how I fretted over that word. Tried others but kept coming back to this one.

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  4. Honest answer. Wonder what's behind it.

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  5. Now, is she repenting something she did, or more likely, something done by her family or connections?

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  6. Oohh - repentance - that's always good for a story - will provide lots of lovely conflict :-)
    Tweeted.

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    1. Thanks for the tweet, Daryl. Lots of conflict is right

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  7. Well written, the whole snippet is a gem.

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  8. Oh those poor girls! And she's obviously going to have to explain her remark in more depth so I'll be highly intrigued to see what she has to share. Great snippet, affecting.

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    1. She will eventually explain. But not right away.

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  9. Oh, fascinating last line. I can't wait to discover more of her story.

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    1. You know what "they" always tell us about info dumps? :)

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  10. Great snippet, Diane! Happy she rescued the girls and definitely can't wait to see what her story is of why she did it.

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    1. Thanks. She's gotten over one hurdle, with more ahead.

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  11. Hm, what's she going to do with two young sidekicks? Interesting!

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  12. Poor girls! And that last line says it all, doesn't it - as well as raising more questions!

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  13. Killer last line, Di! Set that hook!

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  14. Oooo that last word opens so many questions. Nice!

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  15. Dreadful parents, but what is the repentence for? Good hook.

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  16. So glad she's looking out for them.

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